this blog is the continuation of a genuine mystical tradition, unless you get in daily contemplative time and abstain to a significant degree from "entertainment" then you are just wasting your time and mine !
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I know this guy who took ayahuasca. He's a hubric idiot
what do you think was the effect of the ayahuasca on him ?
Distant, thinking too much in his head or rather a wrong thinkingThought he was better than everyone around him, yet tried to act peaceful when I knew there was some sort of contempt under his breath He looks like there's something wrong with him, and when I heard he went to do ayahuasca I knew that was itI knew him before and he might've always been this way but I feel the drug exasperated it So definite brain damage
Definitely looks unhealthy, idk what he eats
yeah i had a feeling that konrad was missing something !thanx for that reply, it's hard to get a balanced perspective on this, the net is so full of self promoting b u l l s h i t !
My family wants to know everything I'm feeling and my brother talks about sending me to a therapist, wtf am I supposed to do? These arguments always start with money, but I'm thinking of possible careers
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"wtf am I supposed to do? "Get a job?
Not a snide remark but if all arguments are revolving around money - probably getting a job would be the one thing to solve them all? You can "think of possible careers" while you're employed. You don't need to be unemployed to think about careers.
*solve = resolve
Nah you're right, but he'll always try to find something to complain about
It's also that if I decide to get into programming I've heard it takes 3 years for a programmer to seriously consider you for hire, so that's three years I'll have to deal with this sort of crap
Isn't your problem though that you're picky? Instead of getting a job now, you'll decide to "get into programming" which will take you at least 4, 5 years? Why not get a job now - whatever you can get - and learn programming in your spare time after work if you feel passion for it? I was the same I kept ruminating - what should be my career etc. - but that's really a kind of masturbatory narcissistic merry-go-round! Then I adopted the attitude of accepting whatever God sends my way and now I have a job that I genuinely love, but it's something I would NEVER imagine doing ... it's just so completely different to what my idiot self "wanted".I feel that while we ask questions like "what is right for me?" or "what do I really want?" or "what should I be doing?" ... we'll be miserable. When you see what cards you've been dealt in this life, you can ask: "considering my skill set and my predispositions - how can I be useful to other people?" - that kind of question is much closer to reality!It's a question of going from thinking to acting, from masturbation to coitus, metaphorically speaking. What have you been paid to do so far? How can you be useful to others? Your career doesn't need to define your whole being... just something to pay the bills that doesn't totally kill your soul, and when you're back from work, you can do your shikantaza.
I deliver pizzas right now, just nothing is ever good enough for this guy. I don't pay my cell phone bill or car insurance, he's just finding things to complain about. I make enough to buy decent food, grass fed beef recently I didn't know my problem was being picky, why do you say that? I really have no problem continuing pizza stuff for another year or so, people are just always bothering me. Like I told him I wanted to live alone and he says "no you can't live alone!" He's ridiculous sometimes I'm really not so worried about my career, I'll figure it out! I just need some time.. Ik I shouldn't think so hard but this is my career I'm talking about
Jesus I'm contradictory at times
It's a big deal at times and other times not so much
I'm never getting married that's all I know
"I deliver pizzas right now'jason, being in traffic fumes is very unhealthy all the latest research is showing V E R Y !
Sorry for all the posts Andrew, but what do you do zakaj? Really we should be more revealing here, I think we're all pretty friendly.. None of us are gonna do some crazy hacker type shit or something
Yeah I smell those truck fines, fucking disgusting I live on Long Island, there's no getting away from all these MORONS 7.5 million of these fucking idiots around me
jason, why not look at real estate, you have good interpersonal skills ?
yeah but the fumes are killing you, toxic nanoparticles, you have a situation to get out of now !
I take that real estate comment as a diss, I'm not gonna sell myself to sell houses I'm gonna look at other jobs
jason, its not a diss, imo it could suit you !the real zen is being open minded to what we don't want to hear !
I'm not going to believe everything you say Besides that takes licensing and it's not something I'd do for an extended amount of time I'd rather talk about something serious like traffic fumes, not real estateThis whole talking through Internet messages is very strange, real life talking would be more productive
Eileen has said you're not always honest, who can be? I'll think more about the real estate, but really it sound like a joke right now
jason i almost feel i know you in real life and one of the things i have concluded having worked in highly technical areas in electronics and software for most of my life is you have no technical aptitude or interest , but have very good interpersonal skills !why not do a licensing course !in the end it's only money, if you had the money you wouldn't work !pizza delivery is a trap you show no sign of getting out of . . !
Im not so bad with electronics, people have told me that!I've also been told I'm a people personand more recently I've been told I should be a writer, without ever telling them I have interest in writing!
It's true, if I had the money I wouldn't do a damned thing
I've seen people think they can go into real estate and completely fail, not that I'm so scared of that, it just seems like a lame job like cutCo knives or something
its not lame job, if you do well then it will give you time and money !there's no money in writing, your publisher (me !) assures you of this : o ) !electronics/computing is very time and attention intensive and takes many years to build skills !
I do like computers thoughThe webI guess I react so negatively to real estate because i could be good at it, but I don't see myself continuing with that
jason , you use computers and the web as a consumer, there's vast gulf between that and the skill level for well paying technical work in those areas your current employment is a trap in a very unhealthy environment with the continual exposure to traffic fumesthis is the big mistake people make on the web, it can absorb as much bullshit as can be thrown at it, but as for the real world . . .there's a very expansive synergy between the net and rl if you keep that rigorous "in touch" with the real world . . if you don't then places like reddit zen do very well as online psych wards . . the schizophrenia of believing one's own bullshit . . !
The exposure to traffic fumes is constant here
I think you're right that the psychedelic experience is not a genuine glimpse into the mystical, but what it can do for some people, is show them how crazy reality is and shakes the foundations of normalcy forever. It is unhealthy however like you say, also for psychological health, it triggers psychotic episodes and it can be hard to reassemble a functional picture of reality afterwards.
Yeah my friend freaked out when he took some sort of research chemicals, something I'll never forget. He took off his shirt and grabbed a knife and was talking to himself saying "I'll have to kill them all"
I did take many things but LSD was by far the most powerful exp. Once it was like being God and the second time it was really a nightmare, maximum paranoia. Never again! However while the LSD exp. was interesting, like seeing what sort of kaleidoscopic madness "The Matrix" aka maya is capable of, it was not similar to the genuine mystical experience I had in 2012 when I received my spiritual baptism from God! The LSD exp. is all still "within" the illusory matrix (even amplifies it) while the spiritual baptism takes place outside of time and space!
yeah it's no defense in this life to be good
i think this lady who has lived her whole life in the Siberian wilderness is more interesting than the alaskan couple.. camera work is definitely better in the alaskan video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tt2AYafET68