Monday, 21 September 2015



there is nothing to say

45 comments:

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  2. I had the creepiest dream. Reminds me of the short story Dustman by ETA Hoffman.

    There was the creepiest doll - puppet, a "woman" with dark hair, it was impossible to say whether it was alive or not (a person or not a person), and this uncertainty caused anxiety and the anxiety made the puppet more real, so real that it broke the frame of the dream, shattered the "screen" of the dreamer's safety and became too real, so real that it became absolutely unbearable.

    Reality as such is something unbearable and impossible we seem to need many layers of protection against it, there are times when a little piece of the real breaks through and it's like seeing a color for the first time. A color you never thought existed or could exist...

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    1. (I meant Sandman instead of Dustman.)

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    2. Sorry for littering your blog with these weird glimpses.

      ----

      Question: what do people on this blog do for meditation?

      I am following a new meditation practice now under the guidance of a master in a Shaiva tradition (Kashmir Shaivism aka Trika) and it's taking me places where my previous "Buddhist" practice never took me... but I see I am only scratching the surface and still playing in front of the entrance gate, I haven't even went truly INSIDE yet...

      For those of you who have read "Zen Flesh, Zen Bones" there is a text called "Centering" there which is actually the Vignan Bhairava Tantra - in which Shiva is disclosing various hints how to catch a glimpse of infinity, that is the tradition I am referring to (Kashmir Shaivism)

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    3. Yeah I had a bad dream a couple of months ago, it was about my envy towards Andrew If I'm to be honest

      When I woke up I had a poem:

      Envy
      Envy
      Envy
      A dark night
      For a young soul


      Something like that at least

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    4. I'm doing shikantaza

      An hour in the morning, or an hour in the afternoon, two hours at night possibly

      I'll sit in a chair or lie on my hammock or bed and just let my mind go where ever it'd like to go, I've had a good amount of success so far by doing this

      Also I'm at the park right now

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    5. zakaj, the weird impulses are were it's at !

      that's your real stuff but then you throw yourself into the fake

      "I am following a new meditation practice now under the guidance of a master in a Shaiva tradition"

      as i said before, what the fuck are you doing here, go spend your online and rl time with whatever nut you are being "under the guidance of"

      look at jasons "shikantaza" post he has got it right and how hard is that ! ?

      no wonder the indian and tibetan religions are so heavy on "reincarnation" the way they screw people around wasting their lives, but even if there was reincarnation they would be wasting the next one !

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    6. "I'll sit in a chair or lie on my hammock or bed and just let my mind go where ever it'd like to go, I've had a good amount of success so far by doing this "

      That's not shikantaza though!

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    7. zakaj, that is shikantaza !

      all these years in correspondence and you are still clueless because you don't do any real work

      your'e a disgrace, stupid slack arse, unbelievable !

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    8. Zakaj, do you hear Andrew? Like he throws these insults at you but I don't think you're listening. It seems like sepher is sorta similar.

      "what the fuck are you doing here" that made me laugh

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    12. You can use the word shikantaza any way you want of course, but that's not the what the officially codified doctrine of Soto Zen would call shikantaza. It goes without saying the term is not copyrighted you may even call doing number 2 in the toilet "shikantaza", nobody will sue you. But why use a Japanese word in the first place? If you want to practice shikantaza, read Fukanzazengi and follow what it says. Unlike you two I actually spent time in a Soto Zen temple in Japan, so I can definitely say, from personal experience, that what you describe as shikantaza is NOT what any Soto Zennist in Japan present or past, would recognize as such.

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    13. (Blogspot really needs an "edit" function. Anyway, the deleted messages above are identical to the last one, just more redundancy and grammatical ugliness.)

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    14. So how many hours of meditation do you do a day?

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  3. lol, let us know when you get to 40 women zakaj !

    http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/guru-sex-scandal-at-mount-eliza-yoga-retreat-20150120-12ugkk.html

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    1. That's just hybris I am not following that guy
      I'm not that gullible I don't fall for fake
      I can recognize genuine mystics
      Even 1 woman is too much!

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    2. so which guy are you following ? you rotate your fakes, christianity, buddhism, pureland, tibetan, kashmir shaivism . .

      just endless proxing into bullshit and a total waste of my time you inconsiderant schmuck !

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    3. Who did I follow before this one? Reggie Ray? No, that was just an audio course on meditation I was following to learn about Tantra. I was never "into" Tibetan Buddhism.

      As for the rest, you try to make it seem as if I'm jumping from one thing to the other. But it's always about infinity, about God. The language and approaches differ yes, but there cannot be two skies.

      Wow I'm wasting so much of your time, 5 minutes it took you to write this post, how long does it take you to make 100 identical blog posts about reddit zen?

      Anyway, if you want me, I'll stop posting again. You saw I am a man of my word, when I said I'll stop posting for 6 months, I kept my word. This time I can stop posting for 6 years if you want.

      This tradition teaches that the essence of God is his absolute freedom (svatantrya). All other attributes (consciousness, bliss, etc.) are secondary; and the attribute of "existence" is excluded.

      The point is to realize your own identity with God / infinity.

      Takes decades of hard work and a personal relationship with a Guru (who represents God for you before you are able to realize that identity directly).

      I have been given the Grace to meet this true Teacher and to practice this authentic path and I am grateful for it. I am receiving real gifts, real progress.

      Anyway, Christianity is all about the identity between Man (nara) and God (Shiva), but the identity is posited only externally, in the Christ; the follower of Christ does not realize this identity in himself, except maybe in Christian mystics.

      Buddhism is too many things - Pure Land posits the identity in the afterlife, in the impossibility...

      Tibetan Buddhism I never liked, I was just interested in Tantra. I am now following a Tantric tradition (Trika aka Kashmir Shaivism).

      Last time you showed your ignorance about Tantra when you connected it to sexual practices!

      The person I am following now is not popular, his videos on YouTube have like 50 all time views. I can show them to you but not here, in private.

      I think that if you saw him, you'd change your mind.

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    4. Zakaj you sorta make me want to cry idk why

      I think if Andrew is anything like me, it's not just the '5 minutes to post', I'm constantly thinking of the interactions here

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    5. I want to see your guru so can you email me dafontejason at gmail dot com

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    6. I'd rather show you this:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMsCNwYMx6I

      He's another respected guru of this tradition, more popular than my guru

      I think you'll find the video to be entertaining

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    7. yeah i'm familiar with lakshmanjoo and the kasmir shavism scene, he's not too bad, but not enlightened whereas kabir was/is enlightened !

      you really want to look at why you feel afraid to say publically who this guru you follow is, what's the big deal ?

      its glaringly inconsistent to be posting here, yet follow this guru who you are afraid to mention publically !

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    10. (Sorry, shared a bad link above.)

      This is the guy I'm following now: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKEgu4sT6k0

      Never before have I made any real progress in meditation!

      (I wasn't afraid to mention him but you tend to be heavy on the insults and I am a fragile being I don't like insults that much.)

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    11. zakaj, how can you claim you are making progress in meditation when you are digging yourself deeper in bullshit and completely lack self insight ?


      you are just falling into the proxying trap !


      he has your number for sure though !

      from that web page of his

      “ all the comments are to be moderated, i.e. I have to approve them first before they are publicly displayed.  The reason to moderate the comments is mainly the presence of tons of fools all over this world, even in “spiritual environments” ”

      you want to have your cake and eat it, some lineage where you can be a guru and sex pot, but unfortunately for you, you also have a very strong sense of what is authentic or not which means you understand i am authentic and he is not !

      you have offered to leave this board, i would suggest that you really vote fully with your feet with what you promote which this month is kasmir shaivism and gabriel pradiipaka and not come back here until your views have changed (if they change)
      it may be several years and i for one will not complain !

      i think this board basically has a didactic zen/mysticism purpose, your views in this area are too contrary for it to be anything but a hugely time consuming waste of time for me, you have my writings on the web, i really do prefer life without contact from you, just one of those things !

      as lakshmanjoo said there are millions, but one can bog you down forever to no effect ! :o)

      sepehr you need to understand what is said here too !

      this board is not reddit zen where everyone is equal and equally free to rant in a totally time consuming waste of time, i have better things to do and better claims on my time so the 7th patriarch blog assumes that i basically know what i am on about and moves from that position forwards . .

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  4. "but there cannot be two skies'

    zakaj, there are two, three, five, one hundred, one hundred thousand skies, you will never understand what i write will you ?

    why can't you say who this guru is, i m e a n . . ?

    why private ?

    you and he have got something to hide ?

    he's into young boys or 600 hundred women or something ?

    : o )

    tantric is just a sophisticated sex club, because you never do any "shikantaza" you are unaware of your true motives . .

    your basic problem is you do not understand or accept solipsism versus the collective paradigm, robert walser versus muktananada so to speak !

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    1. Why do you keep repeating "Tantric is a sex club"? That's like saying "Islam is a terrorist organization" - it's just repeating some meme without doing any actual research.

      Shaivism teaches solipsism!

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMsCNwYMx6I

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    2. zakaj, do you see you are dissing my years of experience in buddhism and what actually happens, again i ask what are you doing here and why can't you say who your "guru" is ?

      zen is about seeing for yourself and being able to talk and write for yourself and not dishing up half done video bullshit !

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    3. My Guru's name is Gabriel I posted a link of his lecture above.

      The ability to talk and write has nothing to do with seeing one's true nature, you could be illiterate in fact the Sixth Patriarch was when he received shaktipat, wasn't he? You know the guy personally so you tell me. Maybe the records are false. Be that as it may, I'm not interested in Zen Buddhism, I come here for your writings and your poetry.

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  5. There is a strong Nietzschean element to Zen that cannot be ignored, Zakak. I think that's and3drew's point.

    I went back to the NC mountains, and I realized the art people make of the geography, the slang words, the poetry, etc. it all becomes entangled with the place, like a multidimensional fluid mirror. The point is not to simply be a passive participant that learns about the poetry, geography, or so forth, but to enact it through creative insight, inspiration...

    By your own work... and not a mirror-image of trying to grasp and regurgitate the work of others.

    You have to learn to stand on your own, basically, not deriving a sense of security from the illusion of fixed relationships with others or so forth. You must be your own man who walks amongst the mountains, oceans, forests, and etc., and enacts/creates some kind of art, so that it becomes a part of the world too, forever in some fluid reverie of growing majesty....

    But one cannot do that by just imitating others.

    But yeah, I think it's cool to visit green regions. I bought a book of poetry and naturalistic writings from Cashiers, NC. I also went to the art museum and saw the historical art from the 1800s and the contemporary stuff...

    I still have a lot of work too, but I find maintaining my inquisitiveness and sharpness to be important while I try to secure stable source of income. This requires nutrition and exercise. After I secure stable source of income, I have plans to do more creative stuff, but that depends on a lot of such as continual favorable socioeconomic situation.

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  6. I got a smaller version of this book... should have gotten the bigger one to see the beautiful illustrations:

    http://www.amazon.com/Blue-Ridge-Nature-Journal-Reflections/dp/1596291397/ref=pd_cp_14_1?ie=UTF8&refRID=0B01G848HX8FZFSNYTC1

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  7. do u often go back and read your own writings andrew or is the act of repeatedly rewriting good enough for you so that you got it internalized and processed and don't need to look back at it

    and that optimism/pessimism post is pretty interesting

    i am pretty pessimistic most of the time, very negative

    man i feel pretty bad about deleting my posts now.. but at least i didn't kill myself lol. it's like i'm a giant pussy, afraid of life and everything and i want to make it stop and there's only one way. but life isn't even that bad and i'm just a drama queen. like nothing in life is really enough to push me to that extreme of ending it, it's all trivial stuff.

    i went for a walk a few days later but not alone, with a friend. he's a grade 9 student here in my hometown. i grew up with this boy, like the rest of the people in this town. we went for a walk in an area where the fire came through. the same place i went for a walk in july when i was under distress. i'm pretty paranoid going alone now especially when there's a bear around again but back then i didn't care about anything i just had to go somewhere and be by myself for a bit.

    so we went to the same place and already some greenery is popping up again amongst the trees. we passed through some neat places. perhaps i'l go back and take some pictures, left my phone last time i went out. plus that bear is getting me paranoid again so i'll have to go with a few people maybe.

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    1. Snakes make me more paranoid than bears, haha... >.>

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    2. no snakes here in my area though there are snakes in saskatchewan. don't think the snakes here are poisonous but i'm not really sure. i only heard about garter snakes being around the province.

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    3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YvzOBrzGpYw&ebc=ANyPxKpj_wTH1nXdlhPRpaX-bl3D92ZQkU-pHj516yTmVW1MdUWxyCZmLE4BEs1PuEKDcq6uqyKJtMZttL0_YgeclJCto0_6CQ

      Mace seemed to work pretty well

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  8. man everytime i think of a question i ask myself first if i should find out for myself instead of asking, do some experimenting on my own. seems like i'm being lazy most of the time.

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    1. I was gonna ask if hui nengs mummy was really him, but I searched on mueller ranges before asking and the answer was there


      I search a lot of random words on Andrews website

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    2. that's on http://mueller_ranges.tripod.com/andrew/pending_poems77.html

      first time i have read it for along while, i'm happy with what's written there . . a l m o s t ! : o)

      it will take practice to use the bear spray quickly and effectively !

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